Manchester festive season :​ The Guide for people who have a low tolerance for Christmas

The damn Christmas markets start November 9th

November 9th sees the return of Manchester’s infamous Christmas markets and its celebrating 20 years of forgetting to return your rentable mugs, a giant Santa that looks like Rainbows Zippy, over priced fat faux German sausage and getting people shit faced after work in bobble hats on mulled wine.  Yes they are a complete rip off that will cause untold damage to your wallet and you’ll no doubt end up in Weatherspoons Waterhouse behind the Town Hall swilling cheeky Vimtos for £3 after but hey… it’s a tradition isn’t it, to complain they go up to early but still go once in November then whinge how commercial and crap they are for the rest of Christmas.  

Also a new edition to the way you can bankrupt yourself getting day time drunk of overpriced alcohol this year is a brand-new Ice Tiki Bar. The bar will apparently include “amazing tropical sculptures including Easter Island ‘Moai’ ice statues”, which is bound to provide endless Instagram opportunities to prove to everyone you are truly in the Christmas spirit

Scruff of the Neck Presents Twisted Wheel with Support from Scuttlers November 15th

Let’s face it, we really want to know what decent gigs are on…..Twisted Wheel had an almighty 2018, performing at Reading and Leeds Festival and alongside Liam Gallagher. With an album set for release this year, the boys will be giving fans a taste of what’s to come with a hometown headline show as part of their Nomad Hat tour. We have a feeling it’s going to be a rowdy one, so get your tickets as it will be a sell out.

Liam Gallagher November 20th

Yes he’s on at the MEN and yes a lot of people are excited by this, but it’s sold out and over £200 on resale rip off site Via gogo and he’s definitely not worth that and that is all I have to say about that.

Sour Grapes Records presents Bones Shake November 23rd

Bones Shake are set to shake the very foundations of the tiny Big Hands bar. With howling distortion, pounding beats and filthy riffs laid on top of blues you can be sure there will be no sign of Christmas in here. Support comes from Hamer with their  speedy onslaught of garage rock n roll, punk trash guitars, distorted phonebox vocals and a heavy back beat that rolls the whole carcass over.

White Lies 5th December

The Mighty White Lies return to Manchester with their own brand of epic moody rock. I’ll be there I love this they give me chills more than a tiki ice sculpture bar can. You should watch them.

Witch Fever 6th December

Witch Fever come to the YES Pink Room for their largest hometown show to-date after selling out the basement well in advance earlier in the year. One of the most talked about bands in the city, the four-piece bounce are blisteringly raw live, bouncing thrillingly between genres at the heavier end of the rock spectrum. This will be a gig remember!

The Rise of Sky Walker released December 19th and For the Love of Sci Fi Fan convention 7th  & 8th

As far as I’m concerned December isn’t the time to put tinsel on a fake plastic tree up in your living it’s the time to go and see the new Starwars movie The Rise of Skywalker. The release date is December 19 with all major cinema holding midnight showings. Directed by The Force Awakens

director JJ Abrams, it is officially the longest Star Wars film ever  at 2 hours and 35 minutes and will bring to a close 42 year saga in a galaxy far far away (wiping away the tears as I’m typing….)

To get you in the mood for the final instalment the biggest and best Sci-Fi fan convention in the UK is back for the 5th year. Taking place at Bowlers Exhibition Centre, Manchester on the 7th and 8th December 2019, guests include Judge Dredd’s Karl Urban, The Punisher himself Jon Bernthal, Robocop’s Peter Weller, Stranger Things star Charlie Heaton, Flash Gordon’s Sam Jones with more big names still to be announced. Plus there’s amazing props including a full sized T-70 X-Wing Fighter from Star Wars, our Tie-Fighter, screen-used Lawmaster from Dredd and brand new for 2019 – the amazing ED-209 from the original Robocop movie.

Libertines Victoria Warehouse 10th & 11th December

What is there to say that hasn’t already been said about the Libertines, such was their influence they convinced people to wear Canadian Mounyt jackets for a decade. Always to be emulated and never to be forgotten The Liberteens are back and the live show is stronger than ever but still haven’t lost their impending sense of wreckage and chaos that follows them everywhere.

The Virginmarys Academy 2 December 14th

Having just arrived back from supporting Slash and Myles Kennedy, and following an unforgettable set with Frank Turner at this year’s Camden Rocks Festival, 2019 has been a memorable year for the Virginmarys. The success of their highly acclaimed 3rd album ‘Northern Sun Sessions’ has lead to the band playing a series of sold out shows already this year before heading back for their homecoming at the Manchester Academy 2. A firm favourite with fan and always creating an electrifying atmosphere this promises to be a night to remember.